Grace Under Pressure 2

It's not often that an organised run happens on a Saturday, and even less often that one occurs both on a Saturday and also within a stones throw of where I happen to be.  So today was a win win situation as the Wingerworth Wobble ticked both of those boxes. The boxes that its didn't tick were the ground would be dry and I might not be fit enough having not really done a lot of running since going on the cruise in the middle of January. As it turned out it was a rather pleasant surprise. Eight familiar faces from my local running clubs were there on the start line and the weather which had been pretty wet leading upto the race looked as it would remain overcast rather than another tumultuous downpour.I hadn't run here before so didn't know what to expect apart from a Youtube video that I managed to watch once before it seeming disappeared in the ether. Or maybe I just imagined seeing it. Anyway if I had to sum up the run in three words it would be a 'glorious undula...

Crown Prosecution Service takes on a whole new meaning  Jersy approves assisted dying for all cardigans Andrew Mountbatton Windsor caught trying to delete all massages Ocado fail to deliver Pensioner still struggling with student loan repayment   In Gorton and Denton by election rank outsider beats rank amateur BAFTA spokesperson announces that Tourette's outbust was a f&%^$£g disgrace Andrew Mountbatton Windsor removes Line of Duty and Succession from 'to watch list'  Hilary Clinton denies all knowledge of her husband Bill  Will Sir Keir Starmer just give up for Lent?   

So it looks as if TOM's proposed solo month in the Caribbean is off as it has proved too difficult for the cruise agent to link the three seperate back to back cruise together with appropriate accomodation and flights. Hopefully he didn't hear my sigh of relief over here in Matlock. And he doesn't seem that bothered about it so let's put it down as a close call. But I might be off to Portugal in August to walk the Coastal Camino. I have the time in between finishing here and starting again in September with a suitable space either side of the trip to get stuff packed here all ready for a late August move to Sutton in Ashfield. Plus when will I next get the chance for a two week jolly that doesn't eat into my regular holidays? Keep tuned for further developments. 

  Last night I had a little jolly out to attend the licensing of one of my Anglican collegues here in Hucknall, Rachael, who having served as a curate in one local church was last night installed as 'priest in charge' at another church. Oh wouldn't that be lovey; to be in charge!! Given that is was an Anglican event, it was all robes and stoles and coloured vestments, and a whole plethora of the church heirarchy parading back and forth. Plus the use of language that left myself and several non Anglican collegues scratching our heads trying to work out what it meant.  One example was being admitted into the 'cure of souls' which struck me as a rather odd phrase. I subsequently discovered that  the word "cure" derives from the Latin cura , meaning "care" or "charge". It refers to the responsibility a pastor has over the spiritual health of a "flock". And possibly goes a little way to explaining the term 'curate' within t...

 In breaking news Grace Under Pressure can reveal that a man who was ejected from the BAFTA's ( British Artisan Food Tasting Association ) for continually shouted out the words 'Cauliflower, Brocolli and Rapini' during the presentation of various awards has been diagnosed as suffering from 'Florets'.

Spokesperson for the NHS, Corri Dor Care, has revealed in an exclusive interview with Grace Under Pressure that the current peak in episodes of 'Curling Fever' will begin to subside in the next few days.  Described by medics as a 'mystery illness' that can be seen in residual low numbers in the highlands of Scotland throughout the year, once every four years the rest of the UK suddenly appears to lose its herd immunity and becomes temprarily infected only for the signs and symptoms to vanish almost as quickly as they appeared after a period of about 14 days Traces of the initial infection that can be easily identified include endless blather down the local pub that includes phrases like 'holding the hammer, in the house and Bruce Mouat is really hot'. These initial signs and symptoms can develop in more serious physical injuries, ice burns, strained hip flexor muscles and a strange propenstity to try and move along the pavement by sliding on one shoe only. Tempo...

  What better way to have the temptations of Jesus explained than to invite the devil himself to recall the story.  Or as one of my congregation exclaimed, "Oh look it's Sylverster McCoy when he played Doctor Who!!."

In a right royal revelation Grace Under Pressure can reveal the results of its own the streets survey of people with nothing better to do than to be out on the wet and miserable streets on Hucknall on a Tuesday afternoon.  And the result is that the great British public has declared that after waiting for 375 years its been long enough and it's time for another royal beheading. Speaking to one of Hucknall's most famous residents, known to all as 'Aunty Monarkee' the word on the street is that "having had the Platyjube celebration, the funeral, the coronation, several cancer diagnosis', various state visits, and Harry's innumerable back and forth visits from across the pond where he just hasn't had time to meet up with 'Pops', it's time for somethigng that would really unite the nation". "And what could be better than a right royal beheading. I mean hardly anyone remembers Charles 1st losing his head back in 1649 so it would be good...

  Andrew Mounting Crisis moment of arrest revealed

   Wonder if he's looking forward to being called Prince Andrew again...oh sorry that should have read 'Prints...Andrew!' Tune in next week to 24 hours in Police Custody for the full story.   

  In a tear inducing tribute to Jessie Jackson, President Donald Trump has praised his ground breaking dance moves and era defining music.  Speaking just before he boarded Airforce 1, President Trump spoke to Grace Under Pressure's very own mover and shaker and revealed, "Out of all the Jackson 5 it was Jesse I always liked best. Thought he was the talented one in the group. The biggliest. Very, very good dancer with a great sense of rhythm. I have most of his records in the Oval Office. Play them every day, every day." "Melania and Jarod, they really like him too. Very clean, very clean. I like Janet too especially that Super Bowl performance. No scandal with Janet unlike his brother Michael; too much monkey business going on there with that Bubbles fella."

Sometimes it's nice to be surprised. This month Radio 2 has been hosting its annual Piano Room where a variety of artists past and present have been invited into the Maida Vale studios to sing alongside the BBC concert orchestra. Artists get to sing three songs, a new song, a cover of a song made famous by someone else and one of thieir own classics.  Yesterday it was Labi Siffri. And I was convinced that if I had been asked to say which of his own classic songs he was going to sing it would be either 'Something inside so strong' or 'It must be love' perhaps made famous due to the wonderful cover by Madness. But instead it was a song I had never heard before, a song simply called 'My Song' And at 80 years of age what a fantastic emotive voice he still has. Sit back and enjoy.    

  Given that I don't appear to be loving much at the moment it seemed serendipitous that Hucknall Harriers should be holding a 'Love run' last night. And you know how much I love a run that has a Strava Art connection. Not having run for three weeks I finally slipped into the lycra over the weekend with a little jolly out at TOM's; one that was definitly more huff and puff than a month before. And with Stonehil Runners opting for a 10km run in the woods which I thought might be both too far and far too muddy, I opted for a 5km effort closer to home, one that stayed on the mean backstreets of Hucknall. I also opted for the 'steady' group which should have been rebranded the 'snails pace' group. Still it got me out, it got me moving and it got the endorphins racing round my body which is more than any of us were doing whilst actually running. And why was it called the 'Love' run. Well having run back and forth, up and down streets with no apparent ...

So today, TOM and I had a little jolly up to Bolsover Cruise club to book our next naughty-cal adventure, a week long trip on P&O Iona, one of the BIG boats, up to the fjords at the end of July to coincide with me finishing my stay here in Hucknall. Amazingly there were no issues, mainly because I knew when we wanted to go and what we wanted with regards all the actual booking, the other member of the party having shown little interest in anything to do with the trip. We even paid for it all up front or rather TOM did. All ready to leave TOM then asked for a cup of coffee before suddenly pulling out the Marella bochure and asking if he could book not just one, not just two but three connecting cruises in the Caribbean and then back across the Atlantic to Malaga for April this year. A total of 28 days. On his own.  I am not sure quite what face I was wearing at the time but i suspect it quickly changed to my 'WTF' face. He had not mentioned a thing about this to me. And that...

  and yes I did leave the sticker on...lol

  Weather is cold, wet and dark. Work is dull. Running has ground to a halt for the past three week. TV is uninspiring. No theatre trips lined up till end of May. My mojo has absconded and I can't be bothered looking for it.

 

  We've not had any bangin' tunes for a little while so I thought I'd rectify that today. Never heard of this particular singer before but with the explosion of country music over the past few years thats possibly to be expected. Anyway its seems to eb quite popular on Radio 2 at the moment judging by the number of times I have heard it being played.  Maybe if they had played this on the ship I might have ended up throwin' a few shapes during the line dancing!! This is Ella Langley and 'Choosin Texas'     

Less than 72 hours after the official offening of the Winter Olympics in Milano-Cortina, icephobic Britons are already convinced that they could do almost all the scheduled events without too much fuss and / or even training. Speaking to Grace Under Pressure's partially defrosted investigator, Hucknall's resident couch potato Gizza Goe, who cancels going to work at the sight of the first snowflake and whose closest encounter with ice is usually via a large G&T revealed, "I mean it can't be that difficult can it."  "That luge for example is just like sliding down a big hill on a tea tray which we've all done as young lads. As for the bobsleigh well thats like you and yer mates all on a bigger tray ogether. Preferably after a few pints and a curry." "Then theres,what's it called, oh yes the bi-athlon.Well I'm pretty convinced big Eric down the club swings both ways so we've got that one covered. And don't foregt skating. It...

  In a last ditch attempt to keep his job Labour chief of Staff Morgan McSweeney, has claimed that the vetting process for the role of Ambassador to USA which he was asked to oversee clearly asked him simply to identify whether Peter Medelssohn had at one stage or another in the recent past been 'besties' with Jeffrey Einstein, younger brother of famous physisict Albert Eistein. Mc Sweeneys vetting apparent showed that Mendelsohn stayed at Einsteins house for what was only a short moment in time. Relatively speaking. Which must be sweet music to everyone's ears in the Labour party  

 

 

  So what the overall impression of the trip then. It was really good with no major complaints at all. The toys didn't come out of the pram and 'the face' didn't need to appear. For the places that we didn't find appealing and / or had not a lot to do once we got there, part of the problem was ours in that we didn't get our act together to book an excursion. I mean if we couldn't manage to find one of the 365 beaches on Antigua then it really was our fault. The ship was really good, small enough to get around without too much effort. The food was good, as was most of the entertainment. the battle for sun beds was 'not too' gladiatorial. And the staff were fantastic. But little things marked it down including the lack of a verandah / bar at the back of the ship where we like to sit and watch the sail aways.  The locating of the Coffee Port on deck 6 meant that unless your cabid was on deck 6 you would never actually walk past it or know it existed. An...

A long day yesterday. We left the ship a little after 1pm to catch the coach to the airport where TOM had a slight panic when he was unable to find his passport in his gillet of many zippered pockets! Then a 3 hour wait as we sat and watched the Tui flight from different part of the UK arrive and passengers spill out onto the tarmac all keen and eager for the start of their cruise. As for the flight itself, well due to a strong tail wind in took just over 7hrs to get back as opposed to 8.30hr going out, so barely enough time to watch three films, eat a meal and have TOM almost soak me again, this time with a tipped over can of coke. The comination of Manchester, 2 degrees and 4am is not one I want to repeat in a hurry. A reviving coffee in Greggs broke up a nearly 2 hour wait for the bus from the airport to Buxton and then on to Matlock where we arrived just before 10am. Back at the house I thought I had been the victim of a robbery until I realised that was simply the state I had left...

So 'homeward bound, I wish I wasn't' to paraphrase one of Simon and Garfunkle's classic tunes. The cases disappeared from outside our cabin overnight and the next time we should see the is back in Manchester. The weather remains overcast and with La Romana offering little appeal, we are sat in a fairly quite Glass House passing the time until we need to catch the coach to the airport at 1.35pm.  

On what should have been our last port of call, Samana in the Dominican Republic, we are still at sea. Late yesterday afternoon an announcement was made that because tooday involving a tender transfer from ship to shore in the midst of what was predicted to be bad weather, it would not be possible to safely 'dock' in Samana.  Hence its going to be a slow meander back to La Romana. To be honest I would have preferred another day in Tortola but I guess other ships are heading there. Never mind at least it's saved me the dilemma of finding yrt another last minute trip for today and can go out on the bang that was yesterday's adventure. So having left it until today to have a go at running round the deck 10 track. (4 laps equals 1 mile) I was up before 7am to discover the greatest internal sway ofvthe entire trip, some of the internal corridor doors closed, rain pouring down and deck 10 sealed off. Ho hum. But what it does mean is that everyone will be fighting for sp...

  A fabulous day at Tortola in the British Virgin Isles. Yes I know who would have thought it. But having learned the hard way, together with the realisation that Sunday in Tortola might not be a hive of things to do, I took fate into my own hands and organised something to do in the form of a Tortola by sea and land trip. And what a great little choice it was. TOM"s crutches meant he was first on board nabbing us padded seats at the front of the boat, the ideal location for sun, views and sea spray as the boat shed across some decidedly choppy waters. Or maybe the driver of the boat simply aimed at them just so we would get wet. It was all hands to hats to stop them being blown over board but it was a great start to the day. In calmer currents we sailed around several nearby islands, each with its unique folk story about, who owned the island, an event that happened there in the past, how it got its name or why it currently acted as a magnet for a flotilla...

  During the course of this trip we have encountered some of the huge cruise ships that are currently afloat. In San Juan we were the smallest of 5 ships in port. Yesterday in St Kitts we were moored up against Celebrity Ascent and looked as if we could fit inside her, like a series of nautical Russian dolls.  This morning in Antigua, big just got even bigger as we were the third ship into the port of St John's alongside the Norwegian Viva (BIG) which itself was dwarfed by Royal Caribbean's Odyssey of the Seas (Massive) which is I think one of the biggest ships out there. It has also been, I have to admit, a physically and mentally draining couple of days. Not because of the amount we have done but because of how little we are doing. I don't know it it's his increased age, declining health, the hot and humid weather or just a case of CBA syndrome (Can't De Arsed) but I wish Tom would show more interest in what we could do whilst out here.  He ...

  Here we are in St Kitts, famous for..uhm hang it will come to me, its on the tip of my tongue, give me a moment. No sorry I can't recall what its famous for. But it did seem to like out of commission red telephone boxes and compared to all of the places we have been too so far with the exception of San Juan, did have a bit of life about it with a well developed port area and a busy(er) town centre. Today was our first and perhaps only organised trip of the 14 day cruise with a 3 hour trip round the island in a convoy of three open sided buses that carried 20 passengers each. It was fun fun way to explore the island with Cooper, our driver /guide seemingly intent on naming every parish we drive through and every building we passed by. Was it better or worse than the two trips we did last year in Bonaire and Antigua, it's difficult to say as a year helps to erase the not so good bits from previous trips. But we had some good photo opportunities at Romney Man...

  If it's Thursday it must be? Trouble is after over a week on here neither of us can recall what day of the week it is never mind where we are. A quick check on the daily Cruise News has informed me that we have docked in Roseau on the island of Dominica, famous for its rain forests and waterfalls so we should not have been surprised that our arrival was greeted by banks of bible black clouds and a sudden tropical downpour, which made the temperatures both hot and humid. We were the only ship here today and so not in competition with other passengers we were able to wait until the showers had passed and the sun appeared. With all of the organised trips appearing to require walking over difficult terrain or negotiating steps to see and of the waterfalls, we had a mooch around the botanical garden where the highlight was a tree that had fallen and crushed a school bus during the hurricane David in 1980.., which if it were known more widely would surely have all the major crui...

Another sea day, one in which we are not as I had thought simply meandering in a variety of zigzags and circles back to another' port in the Dominican Republic but instead heading some 400 plus miles south east to the island of Dominica, which incidentally we sailed by last time we were out in the Caribbean on Britannia.  Sea day is a chance to make best use of some of the ships on board facilties or in our case just sit on the pool deck, reading and people watching. And my oh my, are there some shapes and sizes to watch, including the prime example of what happens when the classic 'Dad Bod' undergoes a genetic mutation and becomes the not in the least bit body positive shape of the 'Cruise Bod ' Something I hope it will never mutate into. And here on Marella Discovery there are some magnificent specimens waddling around, using their outstretched heavily tattooed arms like stabilisers trying to counteract the weight of their lobster red bellies hanging over...

  So this is the half way point as we arrive back in LaRomana where half of the passengers will disembark to go back to a storm lashed UK, whilst a fresh lot of faces have arrived for the start of their Caribbean adventure. And so at the start of part 2, I have written a list of things still to do on board ship. Whether we will is another matter but let's dream big. Indeed let's start as we /I mean to go on with leasurely couple of hours post breakfast, sat in the Glass House, including my first dip of this trip in a cold and salty indoor pool. With people warning us that trips into La Romana came with an obligatory police presence, we decided to dispense with a trip into town and visited the in port tourist complex complete with sunbeds, a large pool and even larger red and white stripped lighthouse. Unfortunately it wasn't covered by our all inclusive package, issues with WiFi proved frustrating, and there were no beds in the shade so after 45 mins or so we came back on...