20th January Gay sex, drugs then home to tackle knife crime


To the surprise of many, caped crusader and regular super hero, Hordan Jenderson has completed his mission in Saudia Arabia to make homosexuality and its associated antics absolutly acceptable to everyone living in the kingdom, 18 months earlier than his initial contract had suggested it might take him. 

Whilst many doubted his ability to do anything except count very large piles of money all day. Hordan Jenderson has infact turned the formerly conservative country into a veritable rainbow of self identification and acceptance, where being spotted in the crowd at a Pride Parade is now the must be seen at event.

Speaking in an exclusive to Grace Under Pressure, Jenderson revealed, " Yeah it was a lot easier than I imagined to be honest. I mean it helped having gay icons like Christiano already here, mincing and prancing about. So much so that there's little point just staying here when there are other world problems to be solved."

"When I heard about Amsterdam and all the inhuman practices that go on there like forcing everyone to live in windmills, ride bicylces wearing clogs, get off your tits on hash browinie and locking little girls in attics until they have written best selling diaries, well  knew it needed my presence."

At the time of going to press Grace Under Pressure in unable to confirm that Hordan Jenderson will be back playing for an inner city club in the premiership by the end of the year, with poverty, social housing and knife crime have all been sorted out by Easter 2025.

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