30th August Middle aged man living the dream


59 year old Harry Barlow was today living the dream after being forced to tag along with his daughter, Bethany, as she went into town to buy his grandson, Alfie, new shoes ready for school next week. 

In a tradition that is as old as traditions go, the last week of August sees a mad rush to shoe shops and discount footwear emporiums up and down to land to buy horrendously expensive shoes that your little darlings with either lose of scuff to f&%k within the first week of the new term.

Speaking to Grace Under Pressure's very own kitten heal clad reporter Harry explained how his trip to shopping hell turned into a nostalgic journey down memory lane. "Me and shopping, well we just don't get on. And the thought of being dragged round town with an irritable 6 year old and my increasingly frustrated daughter trying to buy a pair of shoes that they both like is my idea of a nightmare."

"I wasn't even sure what it would involve but had visions of some new fangled piece of technological kit that required wearing a virtual reality headset to 'experience' what wearing said shoes would look and feel like. And to be honest kids grow out of them so fast these days I don't know why we don't just buy him a pair of size 8's and just get him to wear multiple pairs of socks until he grows into them."

"So just imagine my delight when I caught sight of one of those old fashined shoe measuring devices from my childhood. The type that made a trip to Clarks (other shoe producers are available) a highlight of the year. That piece of mechanical perfection that not only measured the length of your foot and its width but also told you if a potential career in the armed forces or police was out of the question due to flat feet."

"Armed with this set of magic measurements, the assistant then scuttled away into the rear of the shop before emerging several minutes later with a pair of black school shoes so perfect in fit they could have been made to measure by a team of shoe elves just sat out of sight. It was footwear heaven!!"

At the time of going to press Grace Under Pressure can report that unfortunately due to leaving it to the last minute, little Alfie didn't manage to find himself a suitable pair of schools shoes for the start of the new term. But grandad Harry now has a new pair of brogues, loafers and casual shoes all ready to dazzle his mates down the Crown and Anchor.



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