19th July Weather watcher wages war


Rain drenched residents of a sleepy Nottinghamshire town were waiting with gritted teeth today to hear about how other parts of the world are getting considerably more sunshine than they are this summer.

With peak day time temperatures barely reaching 15 degrees and the sky a biblical black, despite the crippling costs the thought of turning the heating on has some appeal. Hucknall resident Gizza Sweater spoke to Grace Under Pressure and revealed, "I know we left the EU with Brexit and all that but I didn't think they could keep all the nice weather too. That's just so unfair. I don't remember Boris saying 'owt 'bout that on the side of a bloody big bus.

"Still I've got a cunning plan. I'm gonna fly me, the missis and our six kids over to the Costa Packet wi' no luggage at all. We'll sit round the pool all day drinking 2 litre bottles of fizzy pop and cider, then fill the empty bottles up with hot air and just bring it back home wi us ready fer winter."

"It's both free and light so no excess luggage charge either. I don't know why no one has thought of it before. It's genius. If it gets cold I'll just open up a bottle and let all that free Mediterranean air owt. Now that's takin' back control!!!""


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