8th September Carrie reduced to stripping

 

It is said that the fall from grace can often be unexpected, swift and brutal but no one who lives and moves within the corridors of power in Westminster could have forseen just how unexpected, swift and brutal it was going to be for Carrie Johnson. 

What started off as a rumour, only to because a whisper that just wouldn't stay quiet, has now developed into a full blown shout of shock after grainy CCTV images thought to have been captured sometime in the past three months, show that the squeeze of the resigning PM has been reduced to stripping.

When shown the footage by Grace Under Pressure a visibly shocked Chris Mason admitted he had never seen anything quite like it. "It's unbelievable, quite unbelievable. It was difficult to identify her at first as we couldn't see her face and the let's say 'unusual clothing' didn't make identification any easier. Plus that banging soundtrack of thrash metal anthems as she twisted and gyrated, stretched and plunged up and down, left and right It was quite disturbing, especially when at one stage young Wilfred appeared in shot for a moment. And that's not something any young child should have to see"

When asked what he thought had caused Mrs Johnson to take up stripping, reputed to be one of the oldest professions in the world, Chris Masons reply was as honest as it was brutal."Well," he explained, "in these times of economic hardship if my wallpaper was worth £800 fucking quid a roll, I try to take it with me too."


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