23rd August In a right old froth

Coffee aficionadoes up and down the land got in a right old froth things this morning upon hearing that 'baristas' are set to strike in England and Wales from next month.

Speaking to Grace Under Pressure, via the coffee lovers app Grinder, self confesed caffeine addict, Mac Chiato, explained, "Whilst I fully suport anyone in their struggle over pay, working conditions and legal aid funding, this particular act, well its just criminal if you ask me, which incidentally no one has. Which is also a crime."

"It should be my human right to buy mass produced ridiculously expensive coffee, most of which is just froth and bubbles, in a non recycleable cup, which I can carry to work, demonstrating in the process that the cost of living crisis hasn't affected my lifestyle, before either drinking it cold some 20 mins later or just throwing it away and making a cup of Aldi Instant. 

"Only now I am being told baristas are going on strike. The highlight of my day is just going into Costa Packet to order a frappalattochinamocha with soya milk and a twist of syrup just on the off chance of being served by by favourite barista Phil Ter. He keeps putting a heart on the top of my drink. I think it must be love."

At the time of going to press the relationship status of Mac Chiato and Phil Ter is still uncertain but will hopefully come to the boil soon.


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