17th June Protect your Gingers


BBC weather man Tomaz Shaffenaker has issued a stark warning in advance of todays predicted heatwave for anyones who has a 'ginger' in the family. 

As the colour on the weather charts changes from yellow to orange to red, and temperatures are expected to hit 30 degrees, it is advised to place your 'ginger' behind closed curtains, in an attic or best of all in a darkened basement.

Follicular expert, Professor Dan Druft, from the University of Tressame, spoke exlusively to Grace Under Pressure and explained, "Gingers are very susceptible to the rays of the sun much like an ice cream or very valuable antique painting. Direct exposure can cause irreversible damage and reduce the value of your 'ginger' until it is practically worthless!"

"Whilst many try to expose their ginger to increasing levels of UV rays during the days of spring, literally smothering them in an inch thick layer of Factor 150, it is an almost impossible task to get the level of exposure just right. Far better to simply encourage your ginger to hibernate away from May until late September just to be on the safe side."

At the time of going to press Grace Under Pressure is unable to confirm whether the nation's favourite ginger, Ed Sheeran will be hibernating away in his Suffolk mansion. One can only hope so. Although it will all probably just result in another CD full of whimsical w&%k being released just in time for Christmas.


 


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