27th May It's all very taxing


In a points scoring exercise Chancellor of the Exchequer Rishi 'billions' Sunak announced that the government would be imposing an energy profits levy on oil and gas companies which was absolutely nothing like the emergency windfall tax on oil and gas companies that the opposition have been calling for for the past 6 months

Tory MP, Ivor Noempathy,  spoke exclusively to Grace Under Pressure and explained, “people on the streets might think that something that is a tax on a windfall, is a windfall tax but thats just not the case mainly because that was Labour’s idea. We have had a much better idea for an Energy Profits Levy, which, instead of taxing an unexpected windfall, which as anyone can see is plainly ridiculous but will instead apply a levy on unexpected excess profits, which makes total sense". 

"And is a very, very different concept to the one we had been refusing to do becasue we didn't think of it first.In fact it is so different I won't bother trying to explain just how different. You'll just have to take my word for it because as you know MP's never ever lie. We are now the Robin Hood party of British politics, one that taxes the rich to the give to the poor, but not enough to stop them being poor of course. Now that would be ridiculous."

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