16th October Adele causes divorce frenzy
After only a single play of her new video on Youtube, divorce lawyers up and down the country have been inundated by calls from frustrated women who want out of their relationships if it means they will end up just like Adele.
Speaking to Grace Under Pressure's very own relatable relationship reporter , Sharon Biggins explained, "Easy On Me, supposedly details Adele’s anguish and pain at her own divorce, but just look at her. Shit she's lost shed loads of weight, her hair, make up and clothes are fantastic, she's driving a classic car and as for that voice well, what a set of lungs she has."
"I mean she even gets to throw litter from her car like she's got no concerns for the planet at all. I saw a clip of it on Breakfast time and even with Charlie and Naga talking all over it, I just had to call a solicitor immediately and start putting me first and just hope my child understands just why Mummy did what Mummy did one day. Althought I probably won't try to sing the explanation."
"Divorce lawyer, Grabtha Dosh, revealed, "Thanks to Adele's new video we expect business to really blossom and to hit gold number of divorces by the end of the month, with a platinumn number of seperations expected when the whole album drops in mid Nov. It's supposed to be one of lifes most traumatic events and most people would pile on the pounds, lounge about in pyjamas all day and sound rough as anything. But if getting consiously uncoupled makes you look that hot, then what woman wouldn't want it?"
Unfortunately, for Adele her video has come to the notice of the Hucknall town council, where the shoot was clearly filmed and she can expect to be issued with a fixed penalty notice for littering within seven days. A council spokesperson said, "She might be able to belt out a banger but we for one will not be going easy on her".
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