18th Liz Truss puts Britain on the map


Britain’s new Secretary of State for Foreign, Commonwealth and Development Affairs, Liz Truss has hit the ground running by announcing plans of her first overseas trips to firm up defence and trade deals with Narnia, Mordor and Azkaban. 

Speaking to Grace Under Pressure, whilst clutching tightly to her Children's Atlas of Far Away Places, Ms Truss was giddy with excitement at the prospect of visiting places she had read about since she was a child. "I feel as if I already know some of the people I am going to be dealing with so that's a huge advantage." she explained. 

"I'll be able to chat with Mr Tumnus and discover how Narnia dealt with sudden changes to their climate. My visit to Mordor to engage with the council of Orks will allow me to see and learn how their country has developed a more sophisticated and compassionate society than ours currently is. And of course in Azkaban I'll be reunited with many of my former conservative cronies now serving time as convicted criminals for crap PPE contracts. It just so exciting especially with trips to Neverland and Wonderland lined up for the new year too"

When asked about her proposed trip to Oz, Ms Truss seemed slightly perlexed. "Oh I know your game," she quipped, "trying to kid me into saying I'm going to a land of yellow brick roads, Emerald Cities and ruby red slippers! What kind of a fool do you think I am."

At the time of going to press Grace Under Pressure is unable to confirm whether Liz Truss has managed to remove the look of utter shock from her face after being informed that 'Oz' was actually a real country. And even more distressing was the prospect that she might actually have to visit one day.





Comments

Popular posts from this blog

6th May Olbia

7th May Naples