6th May Bill Gates fails to reboot his marriage

 


The Word reaching Grace Under Pressures’ digital deliverer is that Icon of the 21st century, Bill Gates, and his Wifi Melinda just don’t Click anymore and are going to File for divorce.

Once viewed as a very Modem family unity, with relationships that Excelled, it seems that now Melinda, who got fed up with her husband being in the Office 365 days a year,  just stares out of the Windows whilst Bill Browses his Spreadsheets.

What is the Driver behind this separation has been open to intense debate with many Trojan theories put forward. One is that Mr Gates is a Mouse in the bedroom with one source describing Mr Gates’ once impressive hardware as now being regularly Micro Soft.

Unsure if this is due to an infection by a Virus it has left him unable to Download, despite trying various Applications sourced on the internet. This has meant Melinda is only able to operate in Safe Mode with her own Tool Bar. A Network of close friends have been unable to Console Melinda but have promised to Monitor the situation.

Rumours abound that Clippy the Office Assistant has been named in proceedings but he claims to have limited Memory of any attempts to get behind Melinda's Firewall and breach her Data. Lawyers are unsure if Melinda's hopes for a divorce settlement will see her take a Megabyte out of his fortunes or whether her head is just stuck in the Cloud(s), but it is expected she will remain a Key board member.

Ultimately despite several attempts to Update, Reboot and System Restore the relationship, it is time to press Control Alt Delete. At the time of going to press Grace Under Pressure is unable to confirm whether Bill Gates has a Back Up relationship in the Cloud or not. We suspect he might have, the old RAM, which means his future might have a better Outlook after all.




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