25th May Belarusian tourism receives unexpected boost
Speaking to Grace Under Pressure's very own cabin boy, irrate passenger, Caniavan Aisleseat, explained the situation. Wearing several layers of clothing to avoid hand luggage chanrges and desperatly crossing her legs having refused to pay to use the on board toilet, Caniavan Ailseseat lamented "We initially thought that this was a freebie offered by President of Belarus, Alexander Lukashenko, in order to get Belarus on the green list. So imagine our surprise when we discovered that in reality it was all about a bomb that had been designed to get past security by being disguised to look very like dissident journalist Roman Protasevich."
"After a lot of kerfuffal, we eventually took off again and finally made it to our destination, albeit seven hours later than planned, which is quite good for Ryan Air to be honest. But this morning I checked my bank balance and saw that £50 had been taken out to cover the cost of an unsheduled bomb / abduction incident, which apparently I should have booked before departure.”
"It’s so unfair, we didn’t even make it into the duty free at the airport never mind the Belarusian State Museum of the History of the Great Patriotic War, the Mound of Glory or the Minskiy Komarovskiy Market. I'm going to complain as soon as I get the feeling back in my legs after several hours sat in crumple class.”
At the time of going to press Grace Under Pressure is unable to confirm that in a brutally swift response the EU has imposed the strictest of sanctions on Belarus by banning it from the Eurovision song contest in 2022. We are however able to verify that Roman Protasevich has given his new Belarisian prison cell a higher rating on Trip Advisor than he did for his flight there.

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