18th May Art for arts sake


Chaos erutped in the Hucknall Gallery of Modern Art and Contemorary Culture as it reopened for business today. One visitor was shocked by a group of mime artists who are reported to have done unspeakable things, whilst another visitor was spotted spraying a protest slogan on a wall in a thick letter setting, something that a police constable described as a 'bold' move. Yet another art lover was insulted in the area of the gallery dealing with its latest exibition of racially insensitive and power crazed artists 'the Oppresionists'. 

For one visitor it brought back unpleasant memories of the time her boyfriend was caught having sex with an abstract artist even though he claimed 'it was not what it looked like' and that he had simply 'been framed' by someone in it for the monet. Hopefully he will turner corner with his behaviour soon. Exiting through the gift shop, her day went from bad to worse as she discivered her transport had been stolen causing her to lament "where did my Van Gogh!" as she was offered a shoulder to crayon by a passerby. 

At the time of going to press Grace Under Pressure apologies if details of said events are a litle sketchy. This blog could of course all be fake rather than another genuine masterpiece done with my usual brushstokes. Chances are though, it's probably just me talking complete pollocks as usual. 









 

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

6th May Olbia

Image
  A chance to stretch our legs today with our first port of call; Olbia, Sardinia. And it was a quick stretch too due to it being only a five hour stay. Up bright and early, so early in fact that the hot food at the buffet wasn't even ready to be served. Still it gave us a chance to watch the ship glide into port past a host of oyster/mussel beds, before performing a 180 degree turn to reverse into it's berth. A couple of short bus rides later and we were in downtown Olbia. But there an hour or so before anything appeared to open, the disadvantage of being early birds and something we don't seem to learn! Not that Olbia had a great deal to see or maybe if we had done the slightest bit of planning beforehand there might have benn but we didn't. It was pleasant enough but that's about it. It was pleasant enough but nothing special, indeed we were back on the ship after just a couple of hours ashore and then managed to sleep away most of th...
Read more

7th May Naples

Image
 I'm sure I've heard the phrase 'see Naples and die' suggesting that it is perhaps not the nicest location in the Mediterranean but if it's good enough for Diego Maradona fir a few years then it's good enough for me for 10 hours. Although the millions of tax free pounds he was paid might have eased his stay. By the time we got up, washed, dressed and up to The Kitchens, the rest of the ship were already there. Compared to the Marie Celeste of yesterday it was absolutely packed, presumably with people having breakfast before heading out on 8am excursions, our excursion was simply going to be the city of Naples itself as possible trips to Vesuvius, Pompei or the Amalfi coast would have been too much / tired.  So on a day when the weather initially seemed uncertain, we jumped aboard route A for the Hop on Hop off bus and headed out into the mayhem that is the Napoli traffic where it was every van, car and scooter for the selves. I think it's bes...
Read more